I'm kind of depressed about this book The Happiness Project. (See photo and link in my sidebar.) It's absolutely, totally, easily what I could have and would have written if given another year or so. Now it's too late: Someone else wrote it. I just finished reading the intro and the entire thing, almost, is full of conclusions I've drawn or would have drawn. I could have written this! Even the cover is similar to what I would have had, except my background would have been white, or green, not blue. Dang. Now what will I write?
The writer, Gretchen Rubin, shares some reactions she received toward her plan to spend a year studying her own quest for more happiness. Her husband was confused because she was already happy. Really? Is there something so confusing about a person wanting to be even more happy?
A dough head at a cocktail party told her, "No offense, but what's the point? I don't think examining how an ordinary person can become happier is very interesting."
WTH, right?! My mouth hung open.
"And anyway," he persisted, "you're not a regular person. You're highly educated, you're a full-time writer, you live on the Upper East Side, you're husband has a good job.... I don't think you're going to have insights that other people would find useful. I think you'll find that your experience doesn't translate well."
I only read the cover of the book and knew exactly what sort of book it was, why it was written, and that I would very much identify with it. In fact, I've been privately been formulating a similar plan as her to-do list.
She talks about making a chart to monitor her goals and progress. I do believe I've heard of and ignored such a concept, more than a few times. But maybe she's onto something.
My blog is sort of a such-a-thing. I have that to-do list there that taunts me. "You haven't even made pesto yet, Natasha. What a sorry sack of internet-savvy you are. It's just basil, oil, garlic and pine nuts! Helloooo!"
So, I'm playing with the idea of... setting highly specific... goals? Hmmm. I might have to ruminate on this.
I do know what I want more of but for some reason I feel like I'm fighting against quicksand to get it. I'm a very excitable person and when I get an idea into my head I'm always the one who has to inspire everyone else. That's the way it's always been. I'm a little tired of it. I want someone to inspire me. I want a partner to achieve things with. Jude's not really excited about the things I'm excited about; he's on his own time line, has his own worries. Maybe having Sarah, our temp nanny, around will be just a little bit of a boost, so I don't feel like I'm trying to do and achieve everything alone.
Already I have:
- given up diet Coke. It's been well over a week. I never kept track because I didn't really decide to give it up. It just happened.
- been lifting weights and doing callisthenics
- been eating frequent small healthy meals and snacks
- have been eating hardly any sugar
- been reading more
- been spending way less time on Twitter
In the next three months, my goals are to:
- try these recipes: beet and cauliflower latkes, saurkraut latkes, berry "paté" (but without the orange peels-- gross), crispy kale (because I'm low on iron and find the pills, er, unpleasant, and I've heard twice now that this is surprisingly yummy. When you're not eating junk regularly, simple food becomes yummier, so maybe. After all, I've been snacking on raw kale lately.), cauliflower tomato cheese bake. I cook tasty vegetables but I do the same things over and over. I'm trying to be adventurous here.
- become a better swimmer
- finish my grain mill painting
- with Sarah's help, finish my present for Rebecca and John
- finish all the small jobs around the house, like putting the towel rack back up, painting over patched marks, etc.
- do more thoughtful things for people
- cash that gift certificate to the day spa, the one Jude bought me in November of 2008, and get a one hour relaxation massage
- start seeing a physiotherapist and get my arches and calves fixed so I can run
- learn the Single Ladies dance and rehearse it with pregnant Elisabeth and her bearded husband, record it, YouTube it.
- write more-- not blog posts
- read more
- make a cool yard snow sculpture with Sarah and the kids
- take more photos
- maybe open an Etsy shop. Maybe.
So, that's my own Happiness Project. I do have other, private goals-- spiritual, marital, etc. But these are the ones for which I'm soliciting encouragement.
Do you have any of your own? I can ask you about them in a month, if you want, to see how you're doing. I wish there was some other way I could motivate/encourage/support the people I love in the goals they want to achieve. Like, maybe become Oprah-rich and host a big fancy gifty party for everyone who achieved a goal. Alas, I can only think to ask you about them and shower you with genuine approval. :-)
Daily Gratitudes
- My son turned ten years old yesterday. Ten! Geez, I vividly remember being ten myself. We went for dinner and to the book store and the kids were all angels despite being tired. I was proud and adoring.
- Lulu said to her preschool teacher and class today, "My mommy always looks beautiful." I learned this when I arrived to fetch Lulu, with my hair in a very disheavled pony tail, my jeans sagging three inches, no make-up on, and teeth unbrushed. If only Vogue was as easy to please.
- Jude let me sleep in today an extra hour.
- Yummy, healthy leftovers.
